"True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen."Francois de La Rochefoucauld
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Change Your Thinking and Lose Weight
Are you a 'look-and-lose' dieter? Have you studied every diet ever created, read a zillion diet books, and yet are still unhappy with your weight? Has your quest for the holy grail of dieting become a substitute for actually making changes required to ...
Life after abuse, there is a rainbow
Women are ten times more likely than men to be victimized. Battered women have more than twice the health care needs and more costly than those who have never been battered. Women who were victimized as a child are more likely to attract men who are ...
To Stay Married, Start Dating
One of my favorite memories from last year was not watching my young daughters rip into their Christmas presents, or seeing them perform in the school talent show. No, my happiest recollection was the date my husband and I went out on one stormy Tuesday ...
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More than 48% of US households are headed by unmarried individuals. The American Association for Single People projects that by 2010, 47.2% of adults will be unmarried. Being single does not mean being alone, nor does being in a couple for the holidays ensure happiness. Let’s dispel some myths!
Myth #1: Single people are lonely at Christmas.
Reality: No moreso than anyone else. This is a projection of people who fear “being alone for the holidays,” a fear of the unknown.
Myth #2: Single people need you to invite them over to your celebration.
Reality: Contrary to perceptions, single people are v. popular at Christmas, and we generally receive lots of invitations. If you want us over, we'd love to be invited, but would prefer it's because you like us, not because you think we need it.
Myth #3: Single people don’t know what to do for the holidays.
Reality: On the contrary, we are used to planning our social lives actively, good at generating options, and used to making unilateral decisions. We’re pros!
Myth #4: Single people are available to perform certain social tasks during the holiday celebration.
Reality: We like to be cherished guests. We don’t like to be the steer among the bulls – invited to get people who don’t get along off of one another’s throats. If you don’t like your family and friends, why would we? “Can you come over and help out with Aunt Edna?” is not an invitation.
Myth #5: Single people are available to do certain physical tasks during the holiday celebration.
Reality: Nor is this an invitation: “It’s John’s in-laws and I want to impress them. Can you come over and help with the hors d’oeuvres?” As best-friend, yes; as the only working-guest, absolutely not.
Myth #6: Single people are misfits,
outsiders.
Reality: On the contrary, most of us have highly developed Emotional Intelligence skills; that’s the reason we get the ‘rescue us’ invitations! Outsiders? It’s about half the adult world now. Take another look!
Myth #7: If a single person isn’t part of a couple, or doesn’t spend Christmas with a couple or family, they will be miserable.
Reality: Come on now. Is it so horrible to celebrate Christmas on a cruise to the Caribbean, coming back rested, tanned and relaxed?
Myth #8: The only “happy” way to spend the holidays is if you are a couple or part of a family.
Reality: If that were so, half the articles on the Internet this time of year wouldn’t be about how to cope with the annual holiday dinner with the relatives, and the divorce rate in the US wouldn’t be 50%.
Myth #9: Single people have “nowhere to go” for the holidays.
Reality: Nowhere to go? We have everywhere to go! I loved my years as Mrs. Santa. Now I’m on-the-go. I’m thinking about Germany this year. There are so many places to go I can’t decide!!
In fact I have so many neat ideas for spending Christmas on-your-own, if you’re stuck I’ll give you a FREE coaching session.
© Susan Dunn, MA Clinical Psychology, cEQc, The EQ Coach™, http://www.susandunn.cc. Coaching, teaching, training, and eBooks for your personal and professional development. Check out the best ebook library on the Internet - http://www.webstrategies.cc/ebooklibrary.html. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for FREE eZine. I train and certify EQ coaches. Email me for information on this fast, affordable, comprehensive, no-residency program.
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 New movies: 'Bolt,' 'Twilight' - St. Louis Post-Dispatch
'Bolt' - 3 Stars (PG; 1:36): Bolt (voice of John Travolta) is a canine TV star who treks across the country with a cat (Susie Essman) and a hamster (Mark Walton) to return to the girl who loves him (Miley Cyrus). This 3-D Disney 'toon travels light ...
It turns out money really does buy happiness. Uh-oh. - Boston Globe
FOR YEARS ECONOMISTS have puzzled over a beguiling paradox: Money is supposed to be a good thing, but beyond the income needed for a basically decent life, nations didn't seem to get any happier as they got richer. This deeply subversive discovery ...
RUBEN NAVARRETTE: Mantra of child happiness: Parents should instill ... - Morning Journal
No comments posted. This has become "a kind of sacred star in the galaxy of parenting wisdom," says child psychologist Aaron Cooper. It is a default dream, what Cooper calls the "fall-back wish" of parents for the lives they'd like their children to ...
What price, happiness? Commentary Teach good values to kids - Daily Oklahoman
SAN DIEGO — I just want my kids to be happy. This has become "a kind of sacred star in the galaxy of parenting wisdom,” says child psychologist Aaron Cooper . It is a default dream, what Cooper calls the "fall-back wish” of parents for the ...
Syndicated column: Child’s happiness should not be the goal - Marion Chronicle-Tribune
SAN DIEGO — “I just want my kids to be happy.” This has become “a kind of sacred star in the galaxy of parenting wisdom,” says child psychologist Aaron Cooper. It is a default dream, what Cooper calls the fall-back wish of parents for the ...
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