"Dreaming in public is an important part of our job description, as science writers, but there are bad dreams as well as good dreams. We're dreamers, you see, but we're also realists, of a sort."William Gibson
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April Fool's Day
April Fool’s Day originates from Germany. It is believed to be the brain child of Gabriel Hoffman who lived in Damstadt during the 1860’s. The day is celebrated in many countries with the execution of elaborate practical jokes on unsuspecting victims. ...
E mom dot com
E Mom dot Com A short story by Ravindra Torane This is a story of a boy named Anko. He liveed in Mumbai, a metro city in India. Anko was 12 year old . He never studied well, he was computer crazy. All the time he sticked to the computer,either playing ...
Learning To Be Funny
For some people, being funny can be a bit of a challenge. As a matter of fact, I used to be one of them. When I would try to tell a joke that wasn't made up by someone else, people would look at me with an expression that said, "Would you like... a ...
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Lawyer Jokes
Q: How does a pregnant woman know she is carrying a future lawyer?
A: She has an extreme craving for baloney.
Q: What is the legal definition of “Appeal”?
A: Something a person slips on in a grocery store.
Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
A: To practice.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 12?
A: Your Honor.
Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?
A: The lawyer charges more.
Q: What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?
A: The caterer.
Q: Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
A: If one side has one, the other side has to get one.
Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A: An offer you can't understand.
Q: What do you call a lawyer gone bad?
A: Senator
Q: Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll called "Divorced Barbie"?
A: It comes with half of Ken's things and alimony.
Q: What's the difference between an attorney and a pit bull?
A: Jewelry.
Q: What's the definition of mixed emotions?
A: Watching your attorney drive over a cliff in your new Ferrari.
Q: What’s the difference between lawyers and accountants?
A: At least accountants know they’re boring.
Stories:
1. A man who had been
caught embezzling millions went to a lawyer. His lawyer told him, "Don’t worry. You’ll never go to jail with all that money? In fact, when the man was sent to prison, he didn’t have a dime.
2. As the lawyer awoke from surgery, he asked, "Why are all the blinds drawn?" The nurse answered, "There's a fire across the street, and we didn't want you to think you had died."
3. God decided to take the devil to court and settle their differences once and for all. Satan heard this, laughed and said, "And where do you think you're going to find a lawyer?"
4. A lawyer is sitting at the desk in his new office. He hears someone coming to the door. To impress his first potential client, he picks up the phone as the door opens and says, "I demand one million and not a penny less." As he hangs up, the man now standing in his office says, "I'm here to hook up your phone."
And finally:
You Might Be A Lawyer If.... You are charging someone to read these jokes.
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A selection of Yugo jokesguardian.co.uk, UK - 8 hours agoAP foreign, Friday November 21 2008 — The new Yugo has an air bag. Before an accident, start pumping real fast. — How do you double the value of a Yugo? ... |
Leno revs up for New Year's Eve at Caesars WindsorDetroit Free Press, United States - 12 hours agoThe jokes delivered by Leno at Caesars Windsor are bound to cover a cross-section of topics. "When you do 'The Tonight Show' monologue, you sort of talk ... |
The week's top political jokes - 11/21/08OhMyGov!, DC - 34 minutes ago1. "The three big domestic automakers are now saying they are working jointly on a new hybrid car. It runs on a combination of state and federal bailout ... |
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